I'm a Nerd

Hey everybody! This week was really rough. As all of you know, I've been struggling with anxiety and panic attacks a lot this year. This week was probably the worst it has ever been. On Monday, I was triggered by some things the speaker in Chapel said, and I went full blown. I couldn't hear, see, or feel Bridey and Allie as they were trying to bring me back. I realized that when I start having a panic attack, I need to focus completely on calming down instead of trying to focus on two things at once. The things I saw while I was in the state of panic were horrifying, and you guys don't want to know about any of them. It took about an hour for Bridey and Allie to get me calm and talking again. After that, I was kept close. That was a very good thing, because I was still having a rough time with what I saw. Bridey and I ended up playing "Real or Not Real", like Katniss and Peeta did at the end of "Mockingjay". It really helped me to sort out my thoughts on what really happened and what was in my head. Wednesday was no better. I had a minor one sitting in chapel, just because of where I was. I was not ready to face that. So, Friday, I did not go to chapel. It was kind of nice to have a day to take a mental break and to gather my thoughts for what I needed to do. Friday night was probably my favorite part of the week. Nikki and Jessi came over, and we played Harry Potter trivia. I realized that I am a complete and total nerd. Going through the trivia questions, I knew almost all of them off the top of my head, and the ones I was told after not remembering them, I totally knew. It was so much fun to have my two favorite Potterheads over to test our knowledge, and just to have time to relax and be together. I am such a total nerd. I can't wait to do it again. This week is gonna be busy. Bridey and I are going to homecoming at ETCS this coming Friday, so that should be fun. Anyways, have a great week everybody!

Stay beautiful!
Marlee