Overcoming Suicide

Hey everybody! Sorry for the disappearance. After my last post, I decided that I needed to take some time to work on me and getting myself in the right mindset. I'm doing somewhat better, but I'm still definitely feeling emotions. I took my test a week ago Thursday, and I got my results on Thursday. I did not pass the math section. That was a hard thing to see, and all the stress and anxiety I had just finished dealing with came roaring back. I have to wait another 36 days before I can take the test again, so I am really stressing. I did manage (somehow) to pass the other sections though, so that's good. I have also been doing a lot of reading lately. I am finally on the third book of the Chiveis trilogy, called "The Kingdom". I've read the series before, but it has been a while since I read it. I'm excited to relive the adventure and see how it ends. Once I finish, it will be back to the reading list, starting with "Delirium" by Lauren Oliver. I

What do you do when the heartache doesn't stop? When you regret every decision you've made because of one decision that hurt you? When you can't get him out of your mind because you're plagued with "What Ifs" and "why did I do this to myself" questions? How do you make the pain stop because it has reduced you to sitting in your house in a hoodie in 97∘ weather because you keep asking yourself "What If?" What do you do when the pain has consumed you and you can't focus on your schoolwork? Do you let the pain consume you or do you try to ignore it by binge watching your favorite show on Netflix? Do you think about the pain you caused him because you weren't ready for this and it all felt too fast? Will you ever stop blaming yourself? What happens when your safe people aren't there because it's summer and everyone has gone home? Do you let yourself spiral down into darkness or do you fight to be back to normal? All of these q